How To Conquer The 2.5 Year Sleep Regression (and why it happens)
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Honestly, after the 4-month sleep regression the 2-year-old sleep regression has to be the hardest.
There is a well-known sleep regression at 2.5 years and many moms have despaired about how challenging it is. Suddenly, your good sleeper is up at all hours!
Dealing with toddler sleep problems can be so challenging because things are more complex compared to when they were just a baby.
So, if you’re there right now then this post is for you. Just read on for tips on how to conquer this tricky stage.
What Does a Sleep Regression Look Like?
A sleep regression occurs when a baby or toddler that normally sleeps well begins waking frequently through the night, or refuses naps.
You may start to stress over how many hours of sleep they’re getting in comparison to what they were getting previously.
Before we go any further I just want to remind you that you can set up everything perfectly for your toddler but you can’t MAKE them sleep. Take that pressure off of yourself right now.
In order to combat this sleep regression, you will need to rule out things like growth spurts and hunger before you can decide that it is a true sleep regression.
A sleep regression can literally start overnight and often parents are entirely unprepared for it.
What to Consider With Toddler Sleep Regressions
Just like babies, toddlers continue to grow and develop at a rapid rate, however, growth spurts don’t very often cause sleep upsets in toddlers so much as they do in babies.
Your toddler will go through unsettled sleep patterns as they learn new things or their schedule changes, but a true sleep regression can last weeks and you will likely try everything to try and fix it.
As a mom of three I’ve come to learn that most things are just a stage. There’s a stage of picky eating, of choosing crazy clothes, of being obsessed with a particular toy, and of sleeping poorly.
Being told to just grin and bear it is not helpful. Instead, it is encouraging to at least have an idea of why your child might be regressing.
Common Reasons for the 2-Year Sleep Regression
There are a multitude of things that can cause sleep disruptions and the truth of it is that you may never be able to pin down the exact reason that your toddler’s sleep has regressed, but below are some of the common ones.
Night Terrors
2/3 of my children have had middle of the night sleep disruptions due to night terrors. They would be crying or calling out but when I went to them they were clearly not awake.
In our case, they have mostly just grown out of them on their own but we did try to make sure that they had a solid bedtime routine and appropriate wake windows so that over-tiredness wasn’t a factor.
If you think your child might have night terrors and you’re looking for some help then read this post about night terrors from Kids Health.
Separation Anxiety
Children go through stages of separation anxiety and it can make sleep times really tricky. One tip that I found helpful for combating this was implementing independent playtime at home on a consistent basis.
It will give your child regular opportunities to feel safe and content on their own and therefore grow more confident with sleep times.
You can read more about how to implement independent playtime with a toddler in this post.
A New Baby
It is super common for a new sibling to come along around the time the your child is 2-years old and this often can lend itself to regressions in many areas including sleep.
Your independent sleeper may start showing some nap resistance or have trouble settling at night. While this is frustrating, it is so important that you spend some extra time showing them love and setting clear expectations and boundaries.
Their world has just had a major change and so they’ll need certainty in the form of consistency on your part.
Developmental Milestones
Toddler sleep issues can often be put down to developmental milestones. They might be on the verge of exploding their vocabulary or advancing in fine motor skill.
Giving them lots of time to work on those new skills during the day can help them settle better at night.
This is a super common reason for sleep disruptions.
If you’re working on a big milestone like potty training or the toddler bed transition, you shouldn’t be taken unaware by some sleep disturbances or even a power struggle.
I know that for my kids, moving to a big kid bed definitely rocked the boat for a night or two.
6 Tips for Dealing with the 2.5 Year Old Sleep Regression:
While in some cases you may just have to stick to your guns and wait it out there are several tips to help make life easier for everyone when going through it.
Keep reading to find out what they are.
#1 Set Up Boundaries
At 2-years of age, your toddler will thrive when sensible boundaries are put in place.
The common thing for parents to do when hit with a sleep regression is to change things up to try and figure out what’s wrong.
After they give up trying, they start to cave in other areas and before you know it, their toddler is struggling even more because now there are no boundaries in place.
Healthy sleep patterns come about as a result of consistency and routine which in turn help to regulate their circadian rhythm.
Something as simple as having a consistent bedtime routine can make a world of difference to the quality of your toddler’s sleep.
One of the best tools that we have ever invested in is a toddler clock. Specifically, the Gro Clock.
We’ve had ours since our firstborn was 18-months old (he’s currently closing in on 5) and it is still going strong.
What does it do?
It changes color depending on whether it is sleep time or time to get up. This will help your toddler tremendously because they know that if they wake in the night it is not time to get up.
Now, the clock in and of itself won’t solve issues if you as the parent aren’t enforcing your family rules, but it can be a super helpful tool.
Here are several toddler clocks that are popular:
By using a toddler clock it really helps to at least enforce some rest time even if they’re not sleeping.
I bought a second-hand toddler clock back when my firstborn was 18-months old and we still use it now with my youngest who is 2.5.
She always points to the clock when I come in to get her up from her nap and says “Mr Sun’s awake!”
#2 Remain Consistent
I’m not actually a huge fan of the phrase ‘sleep regression’. It’s thrown around far too liberally in my opinion and used to cover issues such as sleep associations, etc.
For that reason, if your child has previously had healthy sleep habits and is able to put themselves to sleep independently, then before you panic and change anything. Stop.
Just remain consistent.
Related: 120 + Activities for Toddlers
If your toddler has not yet learnt how to sleep independently, then sleep training is most likely required.
Having them happily sleep in their own bed is such a freeing thing and often allows more sleep for the entire family.
Precious Little Sleep has a great sleep guide for toddlers to get you started –> Toddler and Preschooler Sleep Guide
Children go through phases. Toddlers particularly so.
Their little bodies and minds are growing at an alarming rate. It is no wonder that sometimes their sleep patterns can become a little funky.
I believe that one of the most effective strategies when it comes to parenting toddlers is to simply remain consistent.
This applies to both discipline and to sleep.
You may be tempted to completely change up your toddler’s sleep schedule but that is unlikely to be the answer.
Their world is constantly changing so your consistency will make the world of difference.
#3 Give It Time
This goes hand in hand with remaining consistent.
Before you change anything, just give it time.
I know it’s stressful thinking that your toddler may not be getting enough sleep but if you’re giving them the tools that they need then that is the best you can do.
Generally speaking, I like to say that 2 weeks is ample time to decide whether something needs to be changed. However, this is 2 weeks of solidly poor sleep.
If it’s hit or miss, then I would even allow up to a month of waiting and seeing if things settle on their own.
#4 Reevaluate the Schedule
If time and consistency aren’t helping then the next step is to reevaluate your toddler’s schedule.
There are times in a child’s life where their sleep needs increase or decrease. It is super important to be able to address those needs as they arise.
Make sure that you’re aware of your toddler’s ideal awake times. Perhaps your 2-year old needs more time awake before their nap. You could push it a little later in the day.
Or, if bedtime is the issue, then capping their nap at a certain time can help.
Daytime naps definitely impact night sleep and can cause a vicious cycle of over tiredness if they’re taken away too soon.
If your little one is struggling with night wakings, then I would address those in different ways depending upon what daytime looks like.
If they’re still napping solidly during the day then reducing their daytime sleep total could help.
However, if they are not napping well during the day, then I would say that they’re more likely dealing with a sleep deficit and could greatly benefit from an early bedtime until naps straighten out again.
#5 Troubleshoot
Once you’ve reevaluated your child’s schedule I would suggest troubleshooting other areas.
Both mental and physical exercise play a great part in the successfulness of your child’s sleep times.
This post from Val gives some wonderful tips on how to implement some strategies into your toddler’s day –> How To Solve Sleep Problems for Toddlers and Preschoolers
Other things to consider are:
The Temperature
My kids sleep far better in cooler temperatures (not freezing, mind you!). If they get too hot, my son especially, will sleep fitfully and wake with nightmares.
Do your best to make sure that your toddler’s sleep environment is at a therapeutic temperature.
Screen Time
Some children are more sensitive to screen time than others. If your child is struggling to wind down to sleep, then cutting out or reducing screen time might solve the issue.
Fear
Fear is not something to be flippant about. Often times, it is very real for your child and can cause a lot of disruptions.
Take this into consideration when troubleshooting and then work on some strategies for dealing with it.
#6 Enforce Rest Time
This is something that is going to become more and more important the older your child becomes.
There will come a day when naps are dropped entirely and when they are rest time is still crucial for both your child and the rest of the household.
Even if your toddler is not napping they absolutely must have some amount of rest time.
At age 2 I would make that for at least 1.5 hours whether they sleep or not.
I’ve always required my children to stay in their beds and to be quiet during that time. As they get older I will allow a couple of books if they haven’t fallen asleep within an hour.
Around age 3-4 some children do indeed start to drop their final naps.
I would not move towards that transition at age 2, however, if your child is within the appropriate age-range and is showing signs then the below posts will be of great help to you:
How To Transition Your Little One From Nap Time To Rest Time
How To Do Rest Time {Instead of Naps}
Before I end this post I just want to say that when your child is going through a sleep regression you can feel an enormous amount of pressure.
For whatever reason, we as mothers tend to take everything our child does personally. Yes, we can help by changing some things, but not always.
Ultimately, children are not robots. As mothers, we can only do our best and then step back. As the saying goes:
You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make them drink
We can set up our children to have the best opportunity to sleep, but we cannot enforce that they do.
Reach out to a friend for support, ask experienced mothers for advice, and rest in the knowledge that you are not alone.
Your toddler will sleep again and you’ll be better equipped to deal with any future sleep challenges that arise.
How to Get Through the 2.5 Year Sleep Regression
Instructions
- Remain Consistent - You may naturally want to try and switch things up when your 2-year old's sleep suddenly becomes disrupted. However, before you go changing everything, try and remain consistent for a couple of weeks. If after that time things aren't improving, you can go ahead and reevaluate your child's routine.
- Give it Time - Some sleep regressions just work themselves out. In fact, it isn't uncommon for toddlers to not nap for a few days and then go back to napping. So, along with being consistent, be sure to just give it a little time to make sure it isn't just a phase.
- Reevaluate the Schedule - If you've remained consistent with expectations and have given it some time but still things are challenging...now is the time to reevaluate your toddler's sleep schedule. Perhaps their sleep needs have changed? Or, nap time needs to be capped or timed differently. Try something new to see if it helps.
- Troubleshoot - Aside from your child's routine, there can be other influencing factors on the quality of their sleep. Troubleshoot things like activity, screen time, room temperature, etc. You never know if just one thing could be your magic fix.
- Enforce Rest Time - Even if your toddler does not sleep, they really do still need some down time during the day. Be sure to give them the opportunity to have quiet time and clearly explain your expectations. You could ask them to lie quietly for a while but if they don't fall asleep, then give them some books or other quiet toys to play with for a while.
Notes
This sleep regression is particularly challenging because it can go hand-in-hand with challenging behavior from your toddler as well.
Just remember to give yourselves both grace as you navigate your way through it.
It is also so important to be clear with your expectations and follow through. This will ultimately make for really great sleep habits in the long-term.
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